Investigation Launched into Investigations Launched

Talking Balls No Comments »
This is the sort of thing that leads to us Launching an Investigation.
Talking Balls has announced it is to Launch an Investigation into the number of Investigations that the GAA has Launched. Our investigation will be Launched in the usual way, with a bottle of champagne cracked against the side of a ship or maybe something being cracked against the side of someone’s head.

It has emerged over a period of time that the GAA are wild men for launching investigations. But is there ever an outcome at all, or are all these investigations launched onto an unsuspecting public and then left to float about like the Marie Celeste with no-one on board and no-one sure what happened? Let’s examine some facts.

In May an investigation was launched by the Laois County Board into an incident during a league hurling match in which a player was knocked unconscious.

An April an investigation was launched into an attack on a referee in Tipperary with a hurling stick.

In September 2007 Dublin GAA chiefs were set to launch an investigation into incidents after a SFC match in the county which ended up with an official being reportedly knocked unconscious.

In January 2010 what was launched, only an investigation into the brawl that ruined the O’Byrne Cup quarter-final between Kildare and Laois when seven players were red carded in Portlaoise.

Today it was announced that the Leinster Council will launch an investigation into the events which led to the start of last Sunday’s Leinster SFC quarter-final between Westmeath and Wicklow in O’Connor Park being delayed by 15 minutes.

We have had investigations launched into the use of GAA pitches by Republicans; investigations into under the table payments to managers, investigations into the Cork Players Strike.

We’ve had internal investigations, oral investigations, independent investigations. And all for what? Well we’ve had enough so we’re going ahead with Launching our own Investigation into the Launching of Investigations. We’ll be calling witnesses soon, so be prepared as Japeth the Goat might say.

Leave a Reply